A Month At My Workplace

I decided to take notes on what happened back in the shipping/receiving dock

09/07/2004
  • Mark bought an electronic dart board for his basement. He's fixing it up because his town's sewage system backed up last spring and flooded his basement with poop water. I bet he liked cleaning that up.
09/09/2004
  • Mark was talking on the phone with his wife today and called her a dumb, stupid fu$#^*! b!$%*. she must like to hear that because when she called again later he called her the same thing. Then he swore a lot when he was talking about how stupid she was. Still, I think he loves her.
09/12/2004
  • I don't work on Sunday, but decided to pop in on Ken at his place around 3 PM. He came to the porch wearing a bath robe with no shoes or slippers. Odd.
09/13/2004
  • Mark didn't want to go to work today and started swearing about coming to work. I know he doesn't like to go to work because he swears all the time. I think he doesn't like to go to work because he can swear more at home.
09/14/2004
  • Mark swore a lot. I don't know what for, but he did.
  • After lunch Mark swore some more. when I told him he was violating Company Rule of Conduct #4 he told me to "shut the fuck up" and swore at me some more. That's against the rules and creates a hostile work environment.
09/15/2004
  • Mark expressed an interest in acquiring carnal knowledge of Mary, a co-worker (not her real name).
  • Mark broke the pallet stretch wrapper and swore at it a lot about it being a piece of junk and tried to blame Frank. He didn't actually use the word "junk" though. He used another swear word instead of "junk". He has a potty mouth.
  • Mark found out he can't get his occupational drivers license until June, 2005, and swore at me, the DMV and then at me again. He looked angry so I laughed at him. Then he swore at me some more.
  • I didn't do much but I did wash my hands before returning to work a few times, and I ate a Snickers bar before lunch. Getting sworn at all morning at makes a guy hungry.
  • Mark tried to load a pallet onto the big truck when it wasn't wrapped. We laughed at him, then got yelled at and sworn at until his face turned red
09/16/2004
  • I sugggested to Mark that he can't get his drivers license he should buy a tandem bicycle so he can take his wife to dinner. He didn't think too much of that idea and swore at me again.
09/17/2004
  • Mark's wife totalled his van this morning and got a ticket. He only had liability insurance on it and now has to eat it. He swore for 5 minutes and called his wife that pet name again. I think they can get through this crisis because their mariage is so solid. On the bright side, he can't drive anyway and now he can spend quality time with his wife playing darts in his poopy basement.
09/20/2004
  • Frank decided he wants to produce a outdoor enthusiast calendar of scantily clad women. Done tastefully, of course.
  • I got a migrain headache. Fun.
  • Mark hardly swore at all today. I hope he's OK.
09/21/2004
  • Mark knocked over a stack of bottles today and swore at the mess. Then he tried to blame it on Frank.
  • Frank still wants to make a calendar of tastefully posed topless women.
  • Ken took a half day off to lounge about in his filthy disgusting black robe again.
09/28/2004
  • A banner day for Mark! He dumped a full pallet of finished goods and then topped it off by spilling double-stacked pallets of bottles all over the warehouse. I am going to start a new feature called "Mark's Workplace Follies" if he keeps on dumping stuff.
09/29/2004
  • We tried to piss Mark off and succeeded in making him swear some more. Bravo.
09/30/2004
  • Mark hardly swore today!!!!
  • I developed a new theory today. The owner of the company has to be the most astute businessman in the world to be able to make oodles of money while employing mostly morons. Kudos to the "big guy."

 

 

Packer Party Train
Poor Dan fell for this hard. Sorry.
Dorfworld turns 10 in 2009
A look back at a decade of stupidity and foolishness
My Taper is Missing!
my taper was abducted at work last week. Heinous.
Our Wedding Day
A look at the festivities as seen through my camera.
Dayhiking the Mariner Trail
Yumi and I spend a lovely Sunday afternoon along the lake
You Can Own This Home!!!
Yumi wants to sell her lovely home & I'm gonna help
I'm Going to Be Rich!!!
Goofy William "mistakenly" sent me inside info
A Month in my place of Work
Definitely bizarre & true
Frank Needs a Date
Help a former U.S. Marine and find love
We're Getting Married! But When?
Yes, we're gonna do it. Sometime
Boomer's F-15 Flight
"Boomer", tells us about his joy ride in a F-15 without puking
ESPN is Pissing me off
Their non-sports programming sucks
Players I love to hate
The NFL's biggest shitheads according to me
Road Ragers: Bad Rap?
Road Rage saves lives and makes the roads safer
The birth of dorfworld
After this, I should have aborted

About the top banner:
Well call this guy "Mr T". I dared T to plank our bosses desk and he was dumb enough to do it.

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